The withered heart and mind quivered under the new rule, unable to understand the nasty takeover that happened a little too quick to comprehend. It was just a moment of weakness, they exclaimed, but at that moment, it came back, the opportunistic vulnerability.
Vulnerability with an intense desire to celebrate its victory invited all its friends, also known as the insecurities. This clique together did a commendable job. They went on a hunt, with an aim, to find all that had been hidden and buried. The re-founded treasures were then kept as the proud thorns on the stems of roses. The difference was clear, the change was felt as even the slightest of winds started feeling like a storm. It was at this time when weakness insisted on being the natural form.The entire ordeal of growth and stability seemed to be shaken, as the mind started enjoying roaming across the cynical route.
The necessity for change started calling out loud and clear-but what seemed to be lost was the courage to work on this all over again. The never ending battle of voices in head which had ceased to exist finally found its way back, which in its deranged manner brought a hope, that the courage will return to fight. And that is when there will be a break even and a victory over vulnerability.
He captured my gaze with his deep mesmerizing eyes and I simply got drowned in them without the care of the world and later when I realized, I gave him a shy smile. He amusingly smiled back and we had our moment, the special moment of anticipated love and joy.
The next day,
I looked around again, aching for his hypnotizing gaze with desperation and the same anticipation. There was an unusual expectation that his one look will make my heart go crazy and brisk,
but when I saw him, my heart shattered up a bit as he was busy picking the inside of his nostrils and later devouring it.
#True story 😛
Someday someone got married to a beautiful bride,
The bride later felt that her life had been destroyed, as her groom never showed any interest in her life,
So, one fine day she finally decided to confide,
Sadly, the confrontation didn’t give her the answers she expected rather it made her feel angry on her poorly designed fate or maybe herself. She couldn’t believe that her wedding was nothing but a safeguard in this homophobic domain…
But after the Orlando attack, she stopped cursing her fate and that is when she felt an undefined pain to be the widow of the dead man whom some fools had denied the sheer basic right of life.
I was disturbed, devastated and confused. Nothing was making sense at that moment except for the old man, who I think was my angel in disguise.
He used to just sit there on the same bench every day surrounded by all the stray dogs of the street, probably of the other streets too. They just loved him, in this world, where they were habitual of being looked down upon; this man not only treated them well but also gave them love. He simply adored them. Not even a single dog missed the opportunity to be caressed by him. It was not just about the glucose biscuits he offered them; in fact, it was much more. Their love was evident. The fight for being his favorite was real. Every evening at 6pm, the dogs had a gathering near the bench with desperation in their eyes, waiting for unconditional love; waiting for the old man.
But then one fine day, the old man didn’t appear. It was around 7 and the dogs were still there, waiting, there was not even a sign of movement. There was a look of betrayal and abandonment in their almost drooped eyes. It was so overwhelming and painful to look at; I couldn’t help but buy some biscuits to serve them. I kept few glucose biscuits down in a hope that they will eat it but still no movement. In their mourning, I was uninvited -not even acknowledged. So, I tried to feed one of them in their mouth but he vehemently resisted, the look he gave me clearly said that he doesn’t want me or a biscuit as a consolation prize; he just wanted the old man.
I didn’t have him, so I reluctantly turned my back ready to leave, still feeling sorry, and then suddenly the dogs started barking. I looked behind and there the old man stood covered with dogs by all his sides, some were jumping on him, some were barking demanding an answer for his absence. The sight was worth everything. It was a scene of pure love and hearty get-together. With an involuntary smile, I marched towards the old man.
“Where were you, uncle? They were desperately waiting for you; they didn’t even eat the biscuits I offered them”
“I know Beta! My son succumbed himself to the god this morning, so was busy with all the processions. As soon as I came back home, I rushed here knowing that my other sons will be waiting for me”
I stood there speechless. My limited social skills didn’t guide me towards the appropriate reactions needed in such a situation. My judgmental self was trying to search a glimpse of grief, an aura of denial, a tinge of loss and a look of pain on his face, but there was none. There was just acceptance and immense love for his sons, the one who unfortunately died and the ones who were still licking and jumping on him.
Then finally, after an awkward few seconds, I gave him a small smile and nodded in understanding and maybe, a little sympathy.
He smiled back and called me near him. I obliged and walked towards him between the dogs. He then bowed down to pick up one of the biscuits and asked me to feed them and this time, they happily ate from my hands.
I cannot comprehend what I felt at that moment; it was not just a feeling but an experience of purity, love and power. The purity, love, and power of the old man, who cared enough for these dogs to come back during his period of grief and loss with sheer acceptance of reality.
I looked at him and smiled. He lovingly patted my head. It was probably the best blessing I’ve received in my life and then he asked, “Are you fine beta?”
“Never been better!” I said with a smile and left waving him a goodbye.
And that is when I realized that life keeps giving you something every moment, you should just be receptive enough to take it and suffice to say, after the incident, I just forgot everything that was troubling me.
Thank you old man 🙂
With my heels in my hands, I rushed to catch the 11:30pm Borivali fast at the Churchgate station. I was astonished at the rare sight, an empty station with just a few men stranded here and there. It seemed so surreal. Reminiscing now, I feel that I was brave back then, I didn’t fear to be out in the dark or alone in the first class ladies compartment. If only, my bravery would have been waivered a bit then, I wouldn’t have been scarred for life.
It felt really pleasant to be seated all alone in the train with the cool breeze blowing my hair away. There was no incessant chattering of aunties or continuous fight for seats or low IQ war of words between the frustrated women who thought that the entire train population is conspiring against them. Life seemed good, with soft quite music blazing through my headphones. The train was crawling at its pace to Borivali and so was my mind, a little too lost and a little too free in this empty compartment till Jogeshwari station arrived and this was the time when I actually looked outside. The station was pin-drop silent and my field of sight was unable to locate any living person except for those one or two sleeping on the pavement. Slowly, I allowed paranoia to naturally wrap me, I was feeling scared. The pleasant loneliness became frightening; I decided to scroll through my facebook newsfeed and to water the seeds of my paranoia, the first write-up was about some rape case. I quietly took a deep breath and decided to call up my boyfriend, to kill time and to probably forget about the growing uneasiness.
Fortunately, he picked up on the first ring. I told him I was returning home on an empty train, I deliberately stressed on the word empty. He suggested that we keep talking till I reach home, his care and concern were overwhelming. Slowly, we were lost in our own mindless chattering and the train staggered past Goregaon and crawled towards Malad.
We were discussing our day’s routine when Malad arrived. At Malad, a woman got into the compartment. She was really tall and dusky. Her brown salwar was dirty with mud stains on it. Her hair was pitch black and matted; her slippers were almost giving way. I surmised by the look of it that she didn’t hold a first class pass. I needed company, so I let go of the thought. I told my boyfriend I wasn’t alone in the compartment, but he insisted that we keep talking which I am thankful for.
The train cruised towards Kandivali. It had begun to pick up speed. I looked at the woman, who had taken a seat at the other end of the compartment. She was staring right at me in a queer sort of way. Her eyes were dark and lifeless. She rose and took a few steps towards me, I grabbed my purse, and I wasn’t sure whether I would have to tackle her or to fling it at her. But then she turned towards the door instead of coming at me. She stood at the edge of the floorboard, precariously hanging from the ledge of the door. I had lost my voice, my boyfriend kept saying hello at the other end of the line. “I’m really scared” I stammered into the mouthpiece of my phone. His voice rose with panic, he urged me to keep talking. The woman was sobbing at the door; the wind plastered her tears to her face. “Don’t jump” I said to her. “Don’t jump don’t jump”
But she paid no heed; she leaped out just like that, and disappeared into the darkness.
I was shocked but as soon as I gained my consciousness, I stood immediately and rushed towards the door. I looked behind to see any sign of her in the darkness, but she was nowhere to be seen. I was transfixed, I had started to cry. My boyfriend’s voice turned hazy and then the network gave way. I kept dialling his number; it said call failed…call failed!
What was I to do? Was I to pull the chain? What good would that do, the train would stop in the middle of nowhere. Should I complaint or just go back to the safety of my home inside my duvet? I decided to lodge a complaint at Borivali, tell them that a woman had leaped to her death between Malad and Kandivali. The wait till Borivali was long. I kept dialling my boyfriend; the network played spoil sport. To make matters worse, the lights went off and I sat in complete darkness. I began to shout and scream for help. My cries may have crossed the metal dividers because I heard voices at the other end; which heightened my fear even more.
Thankfully the lights returned and a new sort of courage gripped me. It’s funny, the strength one can draw from light. The train was slowing down, we were approaching Kandivali. I regained my voice and senses. I sat up, wiped away my tears and assessed the situation. I would have to inform the railway authorities, somewhere between Malad and Kandivali, on the tracks, was a body. What if she was alive? Writhing in pain? A sick feeling gripped my insides. How much time before I could get help across to her? Kandivali platform drew up beside the train and I spotted a few solitary figures on the platform. My eyes welled up again. I was sobbing and making incomprehensible sounds like a child. Her face lingered in my memory. Images of her sobbing beside the doorframe kept flashing through my mind.
As the train slowed down, I raised my head and tried to calm my rattled nerves. The train eventually halted and my phone began to vibrate on my lap. Somehow I couldn’t bring myself to answer the phone because as the train started with a jerk, a woman entered the compartment yet again and she had matted hair, worn out shoes, and the same lifeless eyes.
She catches herself in the mirror off guard, Twinkling eyes and a soft smile. Surprised by herself, she starts reminiscing. Little did she know a year ago that she could get back. She had lost all the hopes from life, drowning herself into her own pool of misery. Broken from the world and shattered from within. She didn’t even realize how everything started to get fine. It just happened the day she decided to find solace within herself. People came and gave advice, sent her quotes and made her feel obliged to feel fine but the reality was such that, she could only be fine when she was actually ready to be fine. She accepted that mourning surely did some good to her; it made her realize the value of her smile and the happiness that was bubbling inside. She knew that this feeling was worth fighting for with everything.
It was a long journey, people might say, it was just a year but only she knew how longer that one year felt. How ironic it is when you are all gleeful, the time flies like never before and when you are moping, the time seems to stop. Minutes seem like hours and days like months. You are all smiling on the outside but somewhere something feels dead inside, some spark which seems impossible to find. She remembers frantically working all the time, just to avoid the emptiness inside and the nagging feeling which was continuously questioning her self esteem.
It was certainly a hard time, the persistent unintentional comparison of her own down trodden life with the visible good parts of others life, she didn’t care to think that even others might be going through something, after all everybody has their lives divided into two distinct fragments, one which they proudly show off to the world and the other which they skilfully hide. However, she now believes that nothing is wrong in opening up and showing herself as her experience might help some other poor self suffering from the same predicament.
So she opens up her diary and starts to write, her story which has been left unsaid ever since…but the question is will she ever have enough courage to share it?
To read Part 1- Makau’s and their research- Part 1
Today is the day; the Makau’s are all ready to inject themselves inside their respective subjects. All three have reached their locations eagerly waiting to invade the human mind. They are going to get inside the mind through a method where they will drill a micro mini part of the head to get inside the skull and through the skull in the brain. It is all fully planned, just waited to be executed. We have also attached a high quality camera with the Makau’s to watch and record all their actions; this will help us to know how the process is going on. The camera is adept in showing both inside and outside of the brain.
The camera shows the entry of these Makau’s inside their subjects. The easiest entry was inside the brain of the Arab man, the woman’s brain was quite confusing and the young man’s brain from India took a lot quite a lot of time to reach as it was far from the skull but on the positive size, it seems quite small which will help the Makau to explore it faster saving time.
We are now observing how the Arab man is responding to the Makau’s action. The Makau is forcing him to pull the Burqa(Nakab) from the face of the woman standing in front of him and he does it. The woman looks shocked, terrified and shy but the man; we guess her husband, is looking all angry and fumed. He will surely beat our subject up and he does. Our subject’s brain is secreting hormones making him feel sad, aggressive and confused at the same time. We can use these different hormones for different purposes. Our subject is now in the lift on his way home, the lift is filled with so many people. The Makau is forcing him to slap the person next to him to channelize his aggression somewhere and he slaps him. The hypothesis is proving to be true in the Arab mans case but still, we can’t be sure. The subject is now on his way to the mosque, still confused with his action. Before stepping inside the mosque, the Makau forces him to pick up some mud and throw it inside the mosque but surprisingly the subject is resisting it. He is not allowing his brains order to convert into his actions. This was quite unexpected.
Let’s move on to the other subject,
Over here, The Woman’s system is quite confusing to the Makau; he is still trying to understand it. It has so many types of hormones being secreted at the same time; some are even unknown to us. Let him figure it out till then let’s check out the Indian man’s brain.
It is so far the most interesting brain. It is full of male chauvinism. This only thing this man seems to be proud of is his gender; we can use this trait of his for our benefit. To test him, the Makau slightly pushes him to pee in the public and he readily does so, the push was just minimalistic. We guess that this man is the most gullible, but then there is this other man besides the subject also peeing in public. Maybe this act is normal here and not shameful. So, now the Makau is making the subject to slap the ass of the person peeing next to him, he slaps it. He surely seems to be the most gullible man. All humiliated and insulted, the subject returns back home. The Makau is now making him wear his mother’s saree and bangles. He is restraining it so strong that he breaks the bangle into two pieces. He is not so gullible maybe.
Back to the Woman’s system, maybe, now the Makau has understood the functioning. The Makau sends us a green signal stating his experimentation with the woman and he says that she was doing everything what he was making her do but she started resisting when he was trying to make her burn her clothes.
All these experiments are proving that the humans are gullible but they resist the actions which they strongly oppose. The hypothesis is proven wrong. We will now have to find some other way to make our plan successful, resisting humans will not allow our plan to be successful. We are sending the signals asking the Makau’s to come back to the headquarters.
The Makau’s are now here and are sharing their experience inside the human brain. Each of their experience is showing some kind of subtle similarity. All of the three Makau’s believe that the human behaviour cannot be fully controlled by them when they are inside their brains but the human brains react the same way when something opposing to their mindset happens.
They state that we can use this behaviour of humans for our benefit; they are now requesting us for more time to stay on Earth so as to observe humans as mere spectators. We are ready to oblige but we need to do something of their feet, it cannot be rotated, humans won’t accept. This brings an idea into my mind, humans don’t accept. We can use this weak point of theirs to destroy them.
The Makau’s are asked to sit with us in the headquarter and to observe the earth through our lenses. We start our Earth tour through our special lens which takes us anywhere we want to go. We are planning to keep the observation for few days.
After few days,
Observing the humans helped us to find our answers; we know how we can destroy the Earth. All we have to do is to provide half of the population with a lot of resources and let the other half die of hunger but we will provide this other half with objects of destruction. The first half will be stupid enough to not share their wealth with those who have none as humans are selfish creatures and the other half will be way too jealous and hungry to not react which will force them to start a war. As a result, the whole race will end allowing Makau’s to settle on Earth.