Month: December 2015
Every year is different in its own way, sometimes you have good years and sometimes you have bad years. Sometimes you have a year that is so mundane it kind of passes you by without having any great effect on anything. Sometimes you have years that are so life affirming that you cannot afford to not pay attention to it.
Earlier this morning, I was trying to arrange the pieces of 2015 in my mind to conclude the year and to give it a tag, whether it was good or bad but then, I vividly remember how my year flew by, it just went, so swiftly and this is totally in contrast with the preceding two years that I had. I still clearly remember parts of 2013 and 2014 impacting my life greatly, changing me in a way I never thought it would. 2015 has been a strange one. It has probably been the most non roller coaster year of my life; it had no great ups or any particular downs. It was just more or less constant. I don’t know whether it is a good thing or a bad, but I feel it was maybe a very necessary pause in my life in which I needed to sort a lot of things out to get everything back in place and to just chill.
I didn’t have any vacation this year but it was relaxing in its own way; I have gone off tangent a lot many times than I thought I would. I have tried so many new things this year. The best thing was that I gave myself a lot of time. I went on treks and cycling trips, I binged on desserts, I read innumerable books, I started my first research project and so much more. It was more like a self pampering year, where you just enjoy every bit of life. I also found my love for baking in 2015, the love which is forcing me to rethink my life choices. What a transition! From being a studious nerd to an aspiring baker, sounds too sad to my parents apparently. As clichéd as this may sound after this very year, I do feel like I know myself better and I feel much more happier.
I didn’t learn any great life lessons this year, so I don’t have anything new to boast about but I learnt just one thing that breaks are necessary for implementing the old life lessons that you have got, where you put everything in line and just enjoy life putting all the complications aside. However, I wouldn’t deny that it doesn’t get boring at times, it does. How much ever one craves for a simple non complicated life, over a period of time we want some complications, some miniscule drama to add some spice in life.
Well, in all honesty, I wouldn’t want 2016 to be anything like 2015, but to be more like a roller coaster taking me on a ride of numerous upswings and downswings, thus making my life a little more interesting perhaps and somehow I know it will be so.
In the end, I wish you all A very happy new year.
His craziness was later termed as curiosity; when his mindless inventions turned into reality.
I have always believed in the random acts of kindness. They are something far stronger and can do more for the human race than religion and politics combined but then sadly, it was me, who couldn’t appreciate an act of kindness today. It was really shallow on my part. My reaction to the action was based on popular prejudices and assumptions. I wouldn’t call it my mistake though but I would like to apologize to the person whose kindness was blatantly ignored by me.
It was an hour before dawn, when I left for college, like any other day, I was walking to the bus stop through a deserted ground enjoying the morning stillness and the cool breeze. When I reached the end of the ground, a man was walking towards me adjusting his Lungi and then he murmured something incoherent. I didn’t even bother listening to him and ran past him, as fast as I could towards the main road and then I looked behind. The man was still standing there looking at me, this alarmed me even more and I ran further ahead in an area well lit with few people here and there. This time again I looked back and saw him walking towards me, Though he was at a distance I ran towards the bus stop but then one car stopped besides me and said, that you have dropped your card behind and some man is coming to give it to you. I was confused. I checked my bag, all chains were closed, there was no possibility for any card to fall, but then I checked my pocket and my smart card was missing. So I took two steps towards that man, but too scared to move any forward, I turned my back and started walking towards the bus stop. The car driver then came and handed me my card, I murmured thank you to him and he pointed towards the man who was not visible as he stood behind the car, but I couldn’t thank him as my bus had arrived and also, maybe because I was somehow scared and ashamed. I got in my bus and left.
The whole bus ride, I couldn’t stop thinking about the incident. I couldn’t stop thinking about my unusual behavior. Why did I run by just finding myself with a random man in a deserted route? The female inside me finds the answer to be obvious but the human inside me is criticizing me for judging someone on the basis of societal assumptions and notions. I could have just listened to what he had to say which was possibly along the lines, “Your card has fallen down.” But my paranoia forced me to assume that he was commenting something nasty or singing some substandard song or that he would just grope me there in the dark. There were so many thoughts erupting which I cannot comprehend here.
I was terrified, that moment lasted only for few seconds, but it was the most scared I have ever been in my life and amusingly it was nothing, he was just a kind man trying to help a random stranger. En-route my journey to college, I was trying to empathize with the man, imagining how humiliated he must have felt seeing me run so badly and I couldn’t help but sympathize with all those men who are accused because of some. Also, I was trying to understand the immeasurable amount of torture a girl goes through when something really happens with her. Nothing happened with me, but it felt so many things, what will one feel when something actually happens with them. The mere thought is more than enough to make me shiver due to immense fear.
I don’t even know if I can do justice to the thoughts in my mind through this post because they are so deep and so raw. They are disturbing in fact. They are still debating between my paranoia and cautiousness.
In the end, I would just like to thank that man and wish that someday this world will be a better place to live where such incidences would bring appreciations rather than humiliations.